I doubt that you can develop a thriving love relationship with a person who has Avoidant personality? This is true even if the person has the best of intentions. Why is that?

In my observations it is not the conscious self that maintains the avoidant pattern that is so destructive to loving relationships, instead it is the heart or unconscious self.
Therefore, do not put a person who has a need, interest or capability for a thriving love relationship close to an Avoidant Personality. It will not be a good match.

in my observation, the person with the Avoidant Personality is absolutely closed, at the heart level, to a love relationship. That will never change. Though, at times, it may not look that hopeless.

The Avoidant Personality may act like they want the love relationship. They may believe they want a love relationship. But if that is the case, it because they do not know their heart.

The heart of the Avoidant Personality is completely opposed to a love relationship and their heart will be thoroughly and completely effective in blocking love simply by refusing to enter into a heart-felt relationship.

The heart has reasons of its own and who can know it. But if your heart, or her heart, is really completely avoidant it will not change. You can be married for 20 years and it will not change.

Loving someone who has no intention to love you at the heart level is frustrating, depressing, discouraging, debilitating and sucks the life out of you. It is death by a thousand avoidances. It is painful. It is not good for your health.

Best, therefore, to avoid the Avoidant Person when looking for a healthy long=term relationship.

 Katherine of Toronto, writes, 'In my childhood I was often neglected, abandoned and rejected. George helped me to understand the root of family issues after one session. He uncovered core issues that were holding me back as an adult and has given me the emotional and spiritual support to rise above the abandonment and rejection I went through as a child.'  

Sasha sacrificed to get started and reports, 'I knew I was in a crisis and that I needed something more intense.  I needed more time with somebody.  It was very hard for me financially but I was determined because I knew I had to get here.
I've never developed compassion for myself before - learned how to do it and actually do it. I am healing a little girl in a woman's body. Even though it was a lot of work to come, I have a lot of solid resources and I discovered I had a connection with God that I never knew I had. I just feel a lot lighter. My philosophy will be to love life, be pure and have faith. '

Many people feel desperate like Gene  of Toronto, Ontario who reports, "I desperately needed someone to talk with and help me work out the struggles that I was facing. George was the first therapist I had ever sat down with and with him I felt completely relaxed. His healing prayer therapy had a tremendously positive effect on my life; I literally was freed from strongholds that were at work in my life. I am very grateful to George and sincerely recommend him."  (Gene experienced Gentle Deliverance)

Ken was dealing with depression. He describes our work as follows, 'I have learned to trust George and his advice.  I like the fact that George is gentle (non-judgmental), realistic (practical), has empathy and gives me hope and, therefore, something to stand on and to carefully work out. George left some principles with me on getting out of depression. I came out of the depression.  I am learning to accept that, as a child of God, God loves me and not to judge myself.'

Brief in depth psychotherapy is effective much quicker than normal.  Elizabeth of Ontario wrote this, 'I am amazed at the results. Not only has God given me tremendous insight into my emotional scars and the lies I had believed, He has also replaced these with His truth. I have experienced phenomenal healing and am now confident that complete healing is possible in the immediate future. The added bonus is that, throughout this process, Jesus has become very real, personal and dear to me."    ​

Inner Healing and Depression
Inner Healing makes use of prayer therapy in dealing with personal problems. The benefit of prayer therapy is that difficult issues can sometimes be helped very quickly. Here are some reasons for the efficiency of this method:

1. Let go and let God. We always submit an issue to Jesus proclaiming him Lord, Saviour, Healer and Deliverer of this issue before we go any deeper.
2. Listen to God.  We use an attitude of listening to God as the attitude we begin with. We take a time of silence to listen before dealing with an issue.
3. Guidance of the Holy Spirit.  Because we listen the Holy Spirit can guide us straight to the root issue or key memory to deal with and the core beliefs within these memories.
4. Emotional Learning.  Emotional learning stored in the emotional brain as emotional memories are the foundation or our significant perspective and core beliefs.
5. Core Beliefs.  Emotional problems, repeated patterns, personality issues - a lot of this is generated by key beliefs, life perspectives, unconscious attitudes laid down in our emotional brain within our emotional memory storage bank.
6. Trigger Emotional Relearning.  There are two ways to achieve emotional relearning. In Christian Inner Healing I guide the client to the identification of core beliefs and then we go back into a quiet time of listening prayer to identify divine truth to apply to these beliefs. Divine truth - the active revelation of a word of God - rapidly changes the memory including core belief, attitudes and feelings. The alternative method is the use of Memory Reconsolidation which triggers the emotional brain to edit the emotional memory.

Inner Healing for depression brings healing to the core beliefs, attitudes and perspectives that generate the state of depression and can do so rapidly, completely and permanently. This is an advance over most other therapeutic methods.
​

Links to Pages on original HealMyLife.com:
​Agape Christian Counselling original website.
​Board of Reference 
Client reports
Professional Observers of Inner Healing and Deliverance Retreat

HealMyLife.com articles:
1 Listening Prayer Therapy
2 Grief and Comfort
3 Anger, Hate, Forgiveness, Love
4 Recent Trauma
5 Burden Exchange
6 Identity Consolidation
7 Cleanse the Temple
8 Peace with Heaven
9 Healing of Trauma
10 Listening Prayer for Dreams
11 The Children's Garden
12 Listening Prayer Journal
13 The Theophostic Breakthrough

Crafted Prayers from HealMyLife.com:
​1. Put it on the Altar
2. Job Interview Prayer
3. Prayer of Protection
4.  Listen to God Life-style
5. Faith of the Heart
6. How to pray for difficult people
7. How to pray in a personal crisis
8. How to pray for physical Healing
9. Healing of trauma and PTSD
10. Deliverance from Curses
11. How to break Curses
12. Spiritual Warfare
13.  Partner on a Pedestal
14. Release Expectations,
15. Cut Umbilical Cords (soul ties)

As a therapist, it’s my greatest joy to help people experience inner healing.
​George is a therapist who will focus on permanent deep healing of your  issues, hangups and emotional traumas. He will focus on getting to the root and core of problems. (Using Depth-oriented Brief Therapy)

Yes, I bring a Christian perspective, a loving attitude and respect for people. I provide you with faith-based therapy that is non-judgmental.

​I have been successful in providing clients with sessions where they are listened to and understood and where they feel that they and their beliefs have been respected.

The in depth therapy process I use is a proprietary blend of Coherence Therapy, Memory Reconsolidation and the Listening Prayer process (Payne, Regier and Smith). The process can be applied effectively with or without the Christian prayer therapy component.
You will find that George's therapy sessions are 'no judgement zones' where love, playfulness, acceptance, curiosity and empathy are present.

Just to be clear a 'Christian perspective' does not at all imply lack of education, ongoing professional development or supervised experience.
Along with a Master's degree in individual and marriage  counselling from University of Calgary George has over 40 years of clinical experience. Additional professional development includes: training in Transactional Analysis, Reality Therapy, personality assessment, John and Paula Sandford's material and Ed Smith's  listening prayer approach to emotional healing.
George is skilled and experienced at the professional level in the use of listening prayer to achieve life transformation. This is a very effective method of dealing with core beliefs lodged in previous experience and emotional memories.

​George's recent professional development includes an externship  in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy from Sue Johnson and a workshop from Les Greenberg on emotionally focused therapy of anxiety and depression.

Depth-oriented Brief Therapy (also called Coherence Therapy) was first outlined by Bruce Ecker and Laurel Hulley in Depth-Oriented Brief Therapy (1996). Their goal was to make every session so effective that life changes were obtained in a brief therapy time frame. Book-link: Depth Oriented Brief Therapy. George received an externship training with Bruce Ecker in Coherence Therapy in 2017 in New York.
​
Radiant living
Your emotional health, your transformed life and your enhanced relationship is important to me and my goal in working with you. The tools I use, you can learn to use as well. These can continue your emotional healing and even equip you to work with your children.
May we all be radiant. 



​

How can I control my emotions? And how can I gain emotional intelligence?
To control your emotions, don’t try to control your emotions. Such a willful emotional shut down is not a healthy way to control your emotions. It has bad side-effects. It comes at too great of a cost.
instead of direct shut-down use methods to gain self-control that are gentler and more indirect. Here are some examples:
Writing. Everyday write something about the emotions of the day. This gives you increasing understanding of your emotions. It gives you a way to express your emotions that can lead to greater self-control. It can relieve the pressure of having all those emotional issues circulating in your mind.
Feeling. Set aside a few hours to diary each and all of the feelings that you can get in touch with. Do one at a time. Write down then allow yourself a minute to feel the full intensity of this emotion. Takes some deep breathes and release that feeling. Then repeat with each feeling that surfaces as you give time for each and every feeling to surface.
Memory. Set aside some time with a journal or diary and go through your list of feelings one at a time. Take time to recall the earliest memory associated with this feeling. Write down the memory and the feelings associated with it. This help you connect your feelings with your experiences.
Emotional Intelligence. Follow the above exercises and you will be more in command of your emotions. You will be calmer, understand yourself and likely better able to connect with others. At one level that is emotional intelligence.

Would you forgive someone who cheated on you? That question draws out several different observations.

1. For example, can I, or should I trust someone who betrayed me? Trust is a different issue than forgiveness and cannot be rushed. It must be earned.

2. If I forgive the one who betrayed me does that mean I am not angry with them and hurt? No. You can choose to forgive but still need to talk about the issues and you may still be angry and hurt.
3. Choosing to forgive on a mental level is something you can do. You choose to lay down your ways of getting revenge and choose to want the best for someone - consciously.
4. However, that still leaves another question. Can you forgive someone from your heart just by choosing to do so? No you cannot. Our will and conscious mind cannot overrule our heart (emotional brain.)
Forgiveness of the heart comes with time or with deep healing or as a gift of God. We cannot do that on our own. This may explain the value of good psychotherapy.
By the way, another step is forgiving yourself for allowing this. That is another story.

With Christian Listening prayer Therapy the emotional and core belief components of the memory can be rapidly transformed by the hearing of God's word, the factual memory remains intact. Historical facts remain the same, while emotional facts are significantly changed.  Now that we have the key to transforming core beliefs we have the right tool for healing the heart and changing people's life.


The benefit of healing memories, including traumatic memories, is that the strongholds for any evil spirit are now broken. Now the devil has no foothold. Deliverance from any associated spirit - hatred, fear, etc. - is now extremely easy, simple and without any struggle. That is why I started to call this 'Gentle Deliverance.'

So, if this emotional memory and associated core belief, and others like it, had became a home to a demonic power or presence then when the memory is healed it is completely exposed and vulnerable. We identify this presence after the healing of the memory on the test phase. We go back to the memory to check and see that all is clear. In this case it isn't clear. My client reports, 'There is still a lot of Hate, Fear, Jealousy etc. remaining in the memory.

In the next step in the process I ask the client if they would like to invite in the life of Jesus to replace the feeling they named. (I may not say it is demonic. We are just calling it a feeling at this point.)

When the client invites in the life of Jesus to replace the spirit they usually find the lingering feeling is gone. This is always successful in achieving complete deliverance from that spirit.

The procedure is quick, clean and without trauma. There is no battle with demons, no naming of demons and no resulting confusion and exhaustion. By not naming and invoking evil in an emotional battle, one avoids the spiritual oppression that can result from such invocations.

​Inner healing as Gateway to Deliverance - Gentle Deliverance:

• Uses Christian Listening Prayer Therapy.
• Discovers main Issue that is central to the person's reported distress, (The Root Issue).
• Uses Listening Prayer Therapy and guidance of the Holy Spirit to locate the Key memory. (The Key Memory)
• Explores the memory to identify the powerful core beliefs underlying the root issue. (Core Beliefs)
• Uses Listening Prayer Therapy to receive the godly revelation that is effective in editing the core belief.
• After dissolving core beliefs through listening for God's truth one may revisit the Key Memory only to find a strong feeling - presence - there.
• Invite the Life of Jesus to replace that feeling and, it is gone.​

There is a first hand report of this method from two ordained ministers who had used deliverance methods to work with a couple and then observed as I used focused Listening Prayer Therapy to help their client(s) get unstuck. Their report is fascinating.​
The two ministers involved in deliverance ministry attended an intensive deliverance through inner healing retreat and were impressed with how effective this process is. Their report on Christian Inner healing and deliverance intensive work is here.