​Can a person with avoidant personality disorder have a wife and children?
Yes they can.
The avoidant male or female is somewhat an expert at being peaceful and looking very calm and together. If their partner is not sensitive to the lack of personal sharing in the relationship, then it is quite possible for an avoidant person to end up married and with children.
The Avoidant Personality creates the persona that accomplishes their life purpose to look like they are living when they are just going through the motions. The Avoidant woman looks like the perfect wife by doing everything by the book, following rules, robotic-like. Think of the Stepford wives.
For the Avoidant to avoid risk it is advantageous to be married and have children. It is a safe place to hide. No one can demand that they change. No one thinks there is anything wrong. They are, after all intensely, focused on keeping up appearances and, therefore, looking the part.
Only if their spouse needs intimacy will ther be a problem - a growing dissatisfaction. There is sex without bonding, conversations without sharing, live without real connection. The marital connection, the holy bond, gradually withers away through neglect and so do the two marital partners.
The resultant relationship lacks real love. Is not life-giving. Is not emotionally healthy. But looks like the perfect marriage. Imagine the possibilities for gas-lighting. If you are married to the Avoidant spouse you will never be able to explain to them or to others why you are deeply dissatisfied with the marriage.
Confront your partner? That never happens with an avoidant spouse.
You may not even be clear in your own mind what is wrong. You do not realize that the most basic ingredient in a true godly marriage is missing - the connection, bonding, unity. You may not understand why you are sick and dying. Love maintains the human spirit - our core being. Our core being maintains the health of our body. When the spirit languishes for lack of love so will the body. 
How do you explain to someone outside the marriage that you can never talk about anything of  personal significance with you partner? You can't. No one understands. It is very difficult to explain to your friends and allies what is wrong unless they discern it themselves.

Is people-pleasing part of dependent personality disorder? I am going to look at a definition of the Dependent Personality and add comments as to the People Pleaser.
The dependent personality:

• Has difficulty making everyday decisions without an excessive amount of advice and reassurance from others. To some extent, the People Pleaser will have difficulty in making decisions but not to the same extent as the dependent personality.
• Needs others to assume responsibility for most major areas of his or her life. This is not a primary characteristic of the People Pleaser.
• Has difficulty expressing disagreement with others because of fear of loss of support or approval. This is true of the People Pleaser.
• Has difficulty initiating projects or doing things on his or her own (because of a lack of self-confidence in judgment or abilities rather than a lack of motivation or energy). This is not a primary characteristic of the People Pleaser.
• Goes to excessive lengths to obtain nurturance and support from othersto the point of volunteering to do things that are unpleasant. This is not a primary characteristic of the People Pleaser.
• Feels uncomfortable or helpless when alone because of exaggerated fears of being unable to care for himself or herself, This is not a primary characteristic of the People Pleaser.
• Urgently seeks another relationship as a source of care and support when a close relationship ends. The People Pleaser seeks another relationship as a source of love not so much care and support.
• Is unrealistically preoccupied with fears of being left to take care of himself or herself. The People Pleaser is not so much afraid of taking care of himself or herself and being rejected and without love.

In general, the motivation of the Dependent Personality is different than the People Pleaser and focuses on being taken care of another who makes the decisions. The People Pleaser does not need to be taken care of nor are they unable to make their own decisions but to assure them that they are doing right and are loved.

I doubt that you can develop a thriving love relationship with a person who has Avoidant personality? This is true even if the person has the best of intentions. Why is that?

In my observations it is not the conscious self that maintains the avoidant pattern that is so destructive to loving relationships, instead it is the heart or unconscious self.
Therefore, do not put a person who has a need, interest or capability for a thriving love relationship close to an Avoidant Personality. It will not be a good match.

in my observation, the person with the Avoidant Personality is absolutely closed, at the heart level, to a love relationship. That will never change. Though, at times, it may not look that hopeless.

The Avoidant Personality may act like they want the love relationship. They may believe they want a love relationship. But if that is the case, it because they do not know their heart.

The heart of the Avoidant Personality is completely opposed to a love relationship and their heart will be thoroughly and completely effective in blocking love simply by refusing to enter into a heart-felt relationship.

The heart has reasons of its own and who can know it. But if your heart, or her heart, is really completely avoidant it will not change. You can be married for 20 years and it will not change.

Loving someone who has no intention to love you at the heart level is frustrating, depressing, discouraging, debilitating and sucks the life out of you. It is death by a thousand avoidances. It is painful. It is not good for your health.

Best, therefore, to avoid the Avoidant Person when looking for a healthy long=term relationship.

 Katherine of Toronto, writes, 'In my childhood I was often neglected, abandoned and rejected. George helped me to understand the root of family issues after one session. He uncovered core issues that were holding me back as an adult and has given me the emotional and spiritual support to rise above the abandonment and rejection I went through as a child.'  

Sasha sacrificed to get started and reports, 'I knew I was in a crisis and that I needed something more intense.  I needed more time with somebody.  It was very hard for me financially but I was determined because I knew I had to get here.
I've never developed compassion for myself before - learned how to do it and actually do it. I am healing a little girl in a woman's body. Even though it was a lot of work to come, I have a lot of solid resources and I discovered I had a connection with God that I never knew I had. I just feel a lot lighter. My philosophy will be to love life, be pure and have faith. '

Many people feel desperate like Gene  of Toronto, Ontario who reports, "I desperately needed someone to talk with and help me work out the struggles that I was facing. George was the first therapist I had ever sat down with and with him I felt completely relaxed. His healing prayer therapy had a tremendously positive effect on my life; I literally was freed from strongholds that were at work in my life. I am very grateful to George and sincerely recommend him."  (Gene experienced Gentle Deliverance)

Ken was dealing with depression. He describes our work as follows, 'I have learned to trust George and his advice.  I like the fact that George is gentle (non-judgmental), realistic (practical), has empathy and gives me hope and, therefore, something to stand on and to carefully work out. George left some principles with me on getting out of depression. I came out of the depression.  I am learning to accept that, as a child of God, God loves me and not to judge myself.'

Brief in depth psychotherapy is effective much quicker than normal.  Elizabeth of Ontario wrote this, 'I am amazed at the results. Not only has God given me tremendous insight into my emotional scars and the lies I had believed, He has also replaced these with His truth. I have experienced phenomenal healing and am now confident that complete healing is possible in the immediate future. The added bonus is that, throughout this process, Jesus has become very real, personal and dear to me."    ​

Inner Healing and Depression
Inner Healing makes use of prayer therapy in dealing with personal problems. The benefit of prayer therapy is that difficult issues can sometimes be helped very quickly. Here are some reasons for the efficiency of this method:

1. Let go and let God. We always submit an issue to Jesus proclaiming him Lord, Saviour, Healer and Deliverer of this issue before we go any deeper.
2. Listen to God.  We use an attitude of listening to God as the attitude we begin with. We take a time of silence to listen before dealing with an issue.
3. Guidance of the Holy Spirit.  Because we listen the Holy Spirit can guide us straight to the root issue or key memory to deal with and the core beliefs within these memories.
4. Emotional Learning.  Emotional learning stored in the emotional brain as emotional memories are the foundation or our significant perspective and core beliefs.
5. Core Beliefs.  Emotional problems, repeated patterns, personality issues - a lot of this is generated by key beliefs, life perspectives, unconscious attitudes laid down in our emotional brain within our emotional memory storage bank.
6. Trigger Emotional Relearning.  There are two ways to achieve emotional relearning. In Christian Inner Healing I guide the client to the identification of core beliefs and then we go back into a quiet time of listening prayer to identify divine truth to apply to these beliefs. Divine truth - the active revelation of a word of God - rapidly changes the memory including core belief, attitudes and feelings. The alternative method is the use of Memory Reconsolidation which triggers the emotional brain to edit the emotional memory.

Inner Healing for depression brings healing to the core beliefs, attitudes and perspectives that generate the state of depression and can do so rapidly, completely and permanently. This is an advance over most other therapeutic methods.
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Links to Pages on original HealMyLife.com:
​Agape Christian Counselling original website.
​Board of Reference 
Client reports
Professional Observers of Inner Healing and Deliverance Retreat

HealMyLife.com articles:
1 Listening Prayer Therapy
2 Grief and Comfort
3 Anger, Hate, Forgiveness, Love
4 Recent Trauma
5 Burden Exchange
6 Identity Consolidation
7 Cleanse the Temple
8 Peace with Heaven
9 Healing of Trauma
10 Listening Prayer for Dreams
11 The Children's Garden
12 Listening Prayer Journal
13 The Theophostic Breakthrough

Crafted Prayers from HealMyLife.com:
​1. Put it on the Altar
2. Job Interview Prayer
3. Prayer of Protection
4.  Listen to God Life-style
5. Faith of the Heart
6. How to pray for difficult people
7. How to pray in a personal crisis
8. How to pray for physical Healing
9. Healing of trauma and PTSD
10. Deliverance from Curses
11. How to break Curses
12. Spiritual Warfare
13.  Partner on a Pedestal
14. Release Expectations,
15. Cut Umbilical Cords (soul ties)

As a therapist, it’s my greatest joy to help people experience inner healing.
​George is a therapist who will focus on permanent deep healing of your  issues, hangups and emotional traumas. He will focus on getting to the root and core of problems. (Using Depth-oriented Brief Therapy)

Yes, I bring a Christian perspective, a loving attitude and respect for people. I provide you with faith-based therapy that is non-judgmental.

​I have been successful in providing clients with sessions where they are listened to and understood and where they feel that they and their beliefs have been respected.

The in depth therapy process I use is a proprietary blend of Coherence Therapy, Memory Reconsolidation and the Listening Prayer process (Payne, Regier and Smith). The process can be applied effectively with or without the Christian prayer therapy component.
You will find that George's therapy sessions are 'no judgement zones' where love, playfulness, acceptance, curiosity and empathy are present.

Just to be clear a 'Christian perspective' does not at all imply lack of education, ongoing professional development or supervised experience.
Along with a Master's degree in individual and marriage  counselling from University of Calgary George has over 40 years of clinical experience. Additional professional development includes: training in Transactional Analysis, Reality Therapy, personality assessment, John and Paula Sandford's material and Ed Smith's  listening prayer approach to emotional healing.
George is skilled and experienced at the professional level in the use of listening prayer to achieve life transformation. This is a very effective method of dealing with core beliefs lodged in previous experience and emotional memories.

​George's recent professional development includes an externship  in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy from Sue Johnson and a workshop from Les Greenberg on emotionally focused therapy of anxiety and depression.

Depth-oriented Brief Therapy (also called Coherence Therapy) was first outlined by Bruce Ecker and Laurel Hulley in Depth-Oriented Brief Therapy (1996). Their goal was to make every session so effective that life changes were obtained in a brief therapy time frame. Book-link: Depth Oriented Brief Therapy. George received an externship training with Bruce Ecker in Coherence Therapy in 2017 in New York.
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Radiant living
Your emotional health, your transformed life and your enhanced relationship is important to me and my goal in working with you. The tools I use, you can learn to use as well. These can continue your emotional healing and even equip you to work with your children.
May we all be radiant. 



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